The year Twenty-Twenty has been… I think depressing is the right word. It started out amazing (for me at least) the first 2 months. From March, the rest of the world went through the same thing as I did, so I can’t complain it was a terrible time for me. 2020 definitely isn’t going the way we thought it would. I mentioned in my previous post that I have been away, I took a break from blogging, Twitter, and Pinterest. However, I would still like to share how did the first half of my 2020 go and how I felt during this time.
How Did My First Half Of 2020 Go
End of last year, I decided to quit my job without having another job secured. The worst thing to tell my Asian mom because… Well, if you’re Asian, you’ll definitely understand. I was feeling very lost in my career and wanted to go through the whole self-discovery journey. Sure, I didn’t know if it’ll work but I wanted to try.
I decided that in 2020, it’s time for me to be brave and actually step out of my comfort zone. I had a list of things I wanted to learn and try. I’m turning 27 this year so if not now, when? Maybe visiting Malaysia (where I’m from) and meeting up with friends, getting some advice from them might help. Traveling and meeting new people might give me new ideas about what I want to do next. Maybe even just walking around Manhattan might inspire me, I still need to explore Brooklyn too.
None of that happened. Instead, I stayed home, traveling from my bedroom to the living room and kitchen, and visiting supermarkets to get groceries. Didn’t even get to meet new people because – social distancing.
Exciting plans became failed plans.
I was also doing a little job hunting before I quit my job, just in case, things don’t turn out the way I want it to (yup, it didn’t), at least I’ll have a job huh. And boy, it’s difficult. I’ve been through this when I first moved to the US, I knew it’s tough. This time it was tougher. And every time I didn’t hear back or got a rejection email or failed an interview, I get more frustrated with myself. Anyway, not going to get emotional here because I told myself I need to be more positive! Well, my boyfriend told me to and he’s right.
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Taking a break
The past few months I literally took a break. Just relaxing, barely exercised but I’ve started yoga (and love it) and basically listening to my mom worrying over the pandemic when she’s 9,317k miles away over Whatsapp call and telling me about how she gets groceries and what she eats. I’ve also been binge-watching a lot of shows – trust me, don’t get ALL the streaming sites, that’s when you really will be a couch potato.
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Catching up with friends from 9K miles away
It was also the perfect time to reach out to my friends in Malaysia. There’s a 12-hour time difference and since I didn’t have a job, I could easily tailor our time to whenever they’re available. Haven’t seen most of them in 3 years, it was so great to see them even over a video call. I must say, my conversations with friends are now different. Instead of talking about the latest music artist and gossiping and just talking about god-knows-what, we’re all updating each other on the latest political news and discussing how the economy is now affected by the pandemic.
I thought growing up is just worrying about paying my bills and what I need to cook for dinner, I didn’t expect conversations with my craziest friends to be so different. Don’t judge me, I moved away from them 3 years ago, it’s been a long time since I saw them…
Mental health is important
A lot of what I went through in the first half of 2020 was my mental health. The thoughts I’ve had in my head, the negativity, the disappointment of not being able to do what I wanted to do. I’ve been working a lot for the past 2 years with my previous company and was completely burnt out. On top of that, having no close friends in this big city to lean on didn’t make me feel better. I am, however, really grateful for my amazing boyfriend who has always been there for me 😉
Entering the Second Half of 2020
I’m excited to continue blogging and one of my goals is to be more consistent. Of course, my ultimate goal and top priority is to get a job and I’m working on it! There’s so much going on in the USA and in the world right now. I’m still very worried about COVID-19 and still taking precautions.
So, do continue to wash your hands, and don’t forget to wear a mask when you go out! Take care and stay safe, peeps <3
Tags: blogging
I feel you about 2020… Started out with so many hopes and dreams but it really took a down turn for everyone. I mean there are things we can still be thankful for but it can be hard with the lockdown being extended and such. Hopefully you will get that new job soon enough!! I feel you about exercising. Haven’t done it that much, it sucks doing it at home with limited equipment too. Hopefully the 2nd half of 2020 will be better. Though, we’ll see what we can do. Sending you lots of love!!
Nancy ✨ exquisitely.me
It did feel good, relaxing and being a couch potato *giggles. Thank you, sending you back loves and hope you and your loved ones are safe and well!
These are very challenging times indeed. I’m glad you are taking your time to rediscover yourself and your path, and that you are not alone. I hope you find a job that makes your heart beat faster and still respects your life balance.
Lindifique
It is challenging, indeed. I’m slowly picking myself up and hopefully, these bad times will be over soon!
Oh, I feel ya! At the start of the year I had a very specific plan laid out and I was gonna get there by June and things did start rolling really well… And then came March and everything just STOPPED. But I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason, and perhaps I did need a 2-month break from everything 😀 Some re-evaluating was perhaps needed and now I can start from a relatively clean slate again. We all can! I wish you sooo much luck with job hunting! Stay positive, even though I know how annoying the rejections can be. The job for you is out there and it’ll come when the time is right!
Teresa Maria | Outlandish Blog
Thank you! I hope the day will come soon that I get a job that I’ll love. Despite everything depressing going on, I’m glad most of us got a chance to take a break from our busy lives. It does make a difference! (:
2020 has been an unprecedented kind of rough for most of us — boy, has it been for me. And it seems to be getting harder. The bad thing about blogging is generally you’re your own boss, so it’s easy to slip out of it when you’re down. But the good thing about blogging is it can be a creative outlet that doesn’t have any limitations. I’m also job hunting (lost my job in July, not due to Covid, but due to circumstances out of my control), and blogging has been at least a way to keep some semblance of a normal routine.
Hope things have moved upward for you!
-Jacqie @ thelipsticknarratives.com
I’m sorry to hear that, Jacqie. I’m sending you lots of love and we’ll keep blogging to flex our creative muscle as we go through this. Thank you for reading my post and all the best to us with our job search!